This weekend is Gay Pride in New York City, which means there's going to be a giant parade of non-heterosexuals (mostly) and our supporters, who (if they're not related to us) generally want either 1) our votes, or 2) our dollars.
I marched last year and it was by turns exhilarating and exhausting. I'm really glad I did it. It's quite amazing to see the masses at the parade and think, 'wow -- there are literally a million ppl here and basically nobody (except for some of the zany protesters) hates me because I like to ___ or ___ or even ____.' This is very different than most days, where between 46-86 percent of the population at any given moment would probably kill you without a second thought if they were given the option, just for being unlike them in terms of your sexual preferences/orientation. Anyone who claims that this country/world does not have a serious and long-running (and completely irrational) and in many cases growing animosity toward its non-heterosexual population is either lying or not paying attention!
I probably won't be going this year, not for any particular reason beyond the fact that I have other stuff I need to get done and feel confident that I won't be missed. This isn't to say that I'm not 'proud' of being gay, or think that it's in any way inappropriate to honor our existence (ephemeral as it sometimes seems) with a parade.
I guess the thing about gay pride that's strange to me is all the people -- many of them non-heterosexuals -- who like to comment about what the parade should and shouldn't be. Some people are like: 'oh it's sooo outre, the gay community should really work harder to present ourselves in a more normal light,' which makes me sad or annoyed because 1) I hate the word 'normal' and everything it implies, and 2) I don't really want to be 'accepted' by society at large as someone 'just like them' who happens to be gay. I'm sick of what I think could loosely be called the 'Will and Grace-ification' of the representation of non-heterosexuals that has occurred in popular culture during the past ___ years. Every time I see a gay character on teevee, I want to ask the writers/producers: 'Why are you making this choice?' Is it based on people you actually know, or are you perpetuating a tired stereotype?' While I would not go so far as to say that ALL characters are rooted in the former, I think it's safe to say that a significant majority still are, and that's what I would like to see changed in the next ___ years. (I know this is highly unlikely.) I want to see characters who resonate with the stories -- all too often ignored -- of non-heterosexuals I know and admire, both in real life and throughout history.
Which is not to say I'm opposed to assimilation, either, if that's your thing. Basically I think everyone should be free to do/wear/say whatever they want, as long as it doesn't hurt other people. If some big bear (or some twee boy for that matter) wants to wear heels and a thong and strut down Fifth Avenue, I'm all in favor of it, even if that's the clip that gets shown on the nightly news to the rest of the country, who will be like, 'ha ha, look at those crazy fggts.'
There's a lot of hatred in the world, and all too often we gays get the brunt of it.
So even if I'm not marching this year, I'll be sending good vibes downtown and thinking about all the people who hate me/us for no particular reason, and I'll try to laugh, knowing that they're missing out on so much of what life has to offer.
Right on, Matthew. Awesome Pride post.
Posted by: whygreenberg | 06/26/2010 at 09:18 AM
Bravo!
Posted by: Rod | 06/27/2010 at 06:14 AM